Breaking news: Megyn Kelly spells her name weirdly. Breaking news: Megyn Kelly had a brain transfusion with a baboon. Breaking news: Megyn Kelly uses a dildo covered in American stars and stripes. Breaking news: Megyn Kelly is today’s Daily Dickhead.
You may have heard that yesterday President Obama declared that the federal government was no going to defend The Defense of Marriage Act (or DOMA) in a court of law. DOMA was signed into law by President Clinton back in 1996 and says that ‘no state needs to treat as a marriage a same-sex relationship considered marriage in another state.’ It also ‘defines marriage between one man and one woman.’
Obviously this is big news and an important move by the Obama administration..and the correct move. I’m going to try not to sound like a broken record, but it’s about time that gay men and women weren’t treated like second class citizens by our own government.
Megyn Kelly, however, disagrees. To prove just how ‘fair and balanced’ Fox ‘News’ is, she invited Maggie Gallagher, from the National Organization for Marriage, on her show. They proceeded to basically finger fuck each other over the phone while each one of them attempted to come up with a different way to say that ‘DOMA is the law and President Obama is breaking the law.’
But, as Maggie points out, there may actually be a silver lining in this presidential obstruction of justice:
‘Here is the good news Megyn, President Obama wasn’t really defending this law at all. His Justice Department was trying to throw this case and I think this now open up for the House to intervene in this case and to get somebody in court who actually wants to defend the law. So in a backwards way, I think it’s going to end up being good news for the Defense of Marriage Act.’
Yes, Maggie, that really is good news. The other piece of really good news is that you look like this:
Poor Maggie Gallagher needs a map to find her own vagina and it probably hasn’t been touched since 1973 (if at all).
The best part of this video is at the end (and not just because it’s over) where Megyn says in her best ‘duh’ voice: ‘This is NOT the last you’re going to be hearing about this.’