Fred Hystere’s #3 Album Of 2011: Jamie Woon “Mirrorwriting”

After coming in #4 in the BBC’s annual Sound of 2011 poll, a lot was expected from London-based soul singer, Jamie Woon. After peaking at #15 in the UK album charts back in the early spring, Jamie’s debut album, Mirrorwriting, fell off into oblivion and he’s been scarcely heard of since. And that’s is a damn shame because Mirrorwriting is an album filled with subtle beauty that every music fan should know about.

Jamie graduated from the famed BRIT School, which gave us Amy Winehouse, Imogen Heap and Adele to name a few. His talent is just as massive as all three of those ladies and I’d venture to say that he possesses one of the most beautiful voices on a male solo artist we’ve heard since George Michael – though their styles are extremely different.

Ever since he came out with a couple of well-received singles a few years ago, I’d been looking forward to the release of Jamie’s debut album. However, expectations often times fall short these days – especially with male solo artists – and I honestly didn’t expect anything even remotely as perfect as Mirrorwriting turned out to be.  Listening to his music reminds me of that feeling you get when you go on a first date with someone you’re not too keen on in the beginning, but by the end of the night you’re left holding hands; feeling all googly-eyed and tipsy; heart pounding a mile a minute.

His blend of trip-hoppy R&B combined with that soulful voice of his, surprises and endears you to thoughts of spontaneous lovemaking after drinking a bottle of wine over wonderful conversation. A must hear.

*Jamie Woon’s debut album, Mirrorwriting, is out now via  Polydor.!/jamiewoon


Jamie Woon “Lady Luck”


Jamie Woon “Night Air”

Fred Hystere’s #11 Album Of 2011: Adele “21”

Out of everyone on my list, I struggled with where to place Adele the most. On the one hand, I was more excited by her success in 2011 than any artist’s, because I think she’s as close to a legend in the making as anyone in music right now – and it was extremely refreshing to see true talent get to the top of the charts generally without the help of social media or a big marketing campaign. But on the other hand, the album is very emotional and I wasn’t really in that frame of mind for most of the year.

Word spread about her 2nd album, 21, like wildfire once it was released and, as marketing campaigns go these days, her path to the top of the charts progressed in the most organic of ways possible. As much of a cynic as I am, I found it impossible to root against Adele – mostly because she has such a magnetic and authentic personality; combined with a wonderful laugh that lights up a room almost as quickly as her voice lights up an auditorium.

The reason I didn’t rank her any higher, however, has to do with the fact that I found it difficult to allow myself relate to the album, personally. The feeling I get while listening to much of Adele’s music is a sad one and, like I’ve said many a time, I’ve tried to get away from indulging emotions of sadness simply because I’ve spent so much of my life being sad. 21 is extremely ballad heavy – which doesn’t make it bad at all – shit, ballads are what Adele does best. However, I’m not going through a painful breakup right now, nor do I plan on going through one ever again (hopefully), so, for me, getting through the meat of the album was akin to going on an emotional rollercoaster through my past that I just didn’t feel like going through again.

That said, the entire album isn’t totally depressing and, in fact, my favorite song is the sweeping Elton John-esque love song, One And Only. If I ever decide to get married, let me be the 435,654,673rd person in the world to say that I hope to make that song the one playing during my first dance.

I’m guessing the majority of you have already heard “21” so I won’t bother delving any deeper into the album. But, if you haven’t heard it, depressing or not, it’s an essential album to have among your collection.

PLAY: Rolling In The Deep, Rumour Has It, He Won’t Go, I’ll Be Waiting, One and Only

*Adele’s 2nd album, 21, is out now via XL Recordings.


Adele “One and Only”

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Daily Dickhead: Wegmans “Sell Breasts But Don’t Show Em” Grocery Store

Uh oh, parents.. something’s corrupting your kids. I’ll give you a hint: It’s not gory video games which encourage them to graphically murder one another. It’s also not Sesame Street and it’s pro-poverty agenda. It’s…..are you ready?…….. ADELE’S TITS! OH.MY.GODDDDDDDDDD!

Yes, earlier this week Jezebel reported that grocery store, Wegmans, has censored the December 2011 cover of Cosmopolitan magazine which features a little cleave action from singing goddess, Adele. Of course, like most curious types, the first thing I did upon reading of the de-boobage was Google the cover; fully expecting to see something akin to Janet Jackson’s nipplegate incident circa 2004. But all I saw was this:











..and, gay as I am, I wasn’t scared by what I saw. Like at all.

When contacted, a spokesperson for Wegmans said that apparently they’ve been censoring Cosmopolitan for over a year after receiving several complaints from concerned parents who claimed that the magazine’s covers were too ‘risque’ to be displayed in full. Wegmans also said that, while they didn’t necessarily agree with the criticisms, they felt compelled to respond…by relegating Cosmopolitan into the smut section, presumably next to other magazines of the devil – you know, like Redbook.

Having been born into a European family, let me just say that the American fear of tits is one of the most bizarre phobias in a country full of them. I’ve never understood why we make such a big deal over the female body in this country; treating it as if it were something that’ll turn us to stone if we look at it for too long.

However, I have a theory and I’d like to test it out on all of you. It has to do with tainted breast milk. Studies have shown that breast milk is full of all sorts of amazing nutrients, vitamins, right? But what studies don’t show is that breast milk also contains a chemical which, when mixed with a healthy dose of fucktard salad (made in the womb), makes certain people scared of women. I know, I know..crazy right?

So, while Wegmans has no problem displaying naked chicken tits in their poultry section or men’s tits on the cover of GQ, any hint of milk-making female tits must be covered up! Genius!

Thanks, Wegmans for perpetuating stereotypes, shunning the female body middle east-style aaaaaaand being huge pussies.

The Hotness: Mother Mother, Mr. Little Jeans, Adele

The Hotness is your daily look at 3 new songs that are amazing, essential, and are sure to make you horny. Ok, the last part isn’t necessarily true. But if you don’t like at least one of these three songs, you need to check 1) Your testosterone levels 2) Your estrogen levels 3) Your hearing.

Mother Mother are a 5-piece Canadian band, based in the beautiful city of Vancouver. Their 3rd album, Eureka, is set to hit stores on 15 March and I’m absolutely loving it. The dueling male-female vocals will remind some of a much more playful version of fellow Canadians, Star, but they remind me of now-defunct 90s band, That Dog (minus the violins), and do powerpop better than just about anyone out there; using a whole range of different instruments to create their fun-as-fuck sound. I’ve been all over their latest album, and I highly recommend it to anyone who longs for the days of 90s powerpop perfected by Imperial Teen, and others. My favorite song is called, Problems, and you can check it out below. Eureka is out 15 March on Last Gang Records, which has released albums by Metric, The New Pornographers, Crystal Castles, Chromeo, and Fan Death (among others).

Mr. Little Jeans is the moniker of Norwegian solo artist, Monica Birkenes. Her music sounds sort of like a more organic version of fellow Norwegian singer, Annie, and also Kylie Minogue.  In the last few years, she’s been getting lots of viral buzz by releasing such gems as Angel, Faking Gold, Stones in the Attic, and (my favorite) Rescue, which you may recognize from HP’s latest commercials. She’s currently in the studio, working on her debut album with super-producer, Greg Kurstin, of Lily Allen fame (among others) and should be released sometime in 2011 on Neon Gold Records.

Adele‘s new album, 21, is the album of the year, thus far, in my opinion. For anyone that has been through heartache, for anyone that loves old souls, for anyone that loves timeless piano driven music, and for anyone that loves a powerful female vocal, you need to hear this album. Rumour Has It is the 2nd track on the album, and one of my favorites. It’s a pretty obvious choice as a single in the future and should easily be #1 when it’s released. 21 is out now on XL/Columbia.



      Mother Mother 'Problems'



      Mr. Little Jeans 'Rescue'



      Adele 'Rumour Has It'


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